In my blog posting “Primary Relationships”, I looked at how God comes first, your spouse second and everyone else after that.  A reader asked some very important questions: the rest of the non-Baha’i world that is either atheist or agnostic seems to believe that familial relationships can be cultivated without God’s assistance. While I believe [...]

In my blog posting “Primary Relationships”, I looked at how God comes first, your spouse second and everyone else after that.  A reader asked some very important questions:

• the rest of the non-Baha’i world that is either atheist or agnostic seems to believe that familial relationships can be cultivated without God’s assistance.
• While I believe in a strong deference to God, it is difficult for me to accept that we can only know others through God.
• I am Bahá’í and marrying into a Baha’i family, but what about those who parent(s) are not Bahá’í, does this mean that they will necessarily be handicapped in their family closeness because one party is choosing not to look at it through God’s eyes?

There’s a lot to think about for each of these questions, and like everything in the Faith, there are no easy or simple answers.  As a result, I thought these questions deserved a blog posting all of its own.

First of all, the point I was trying to make in the previous posting, is that the easiest way to get closer to each other is to get closer to God.  Obviously this is easier if both parties believe in God and are willing to move towards Him!  As the diagram below shows, the relationship would be closer than if neither partner was moving closer to God, but not nearly as close as it could be.

The reason the Manifestations of God have come to earth is because mankind has turned away from God’s injunctions.  Everything is easier when we follow His guidance no matter in which religion it is found.   Many people think they can make their own decisions or do things their way, but without God as the uniting factor, it won’t work.  Shoghi Effendi tells us how the pendulum can swing from one extreme to another, and then back again:

These fashions are not permanent they are bound to change. Today the fad is a materialistic view of life and of the world. A day will soon come when it will become deeply religious and spiritual. In fact, we can discern the beginning of such a change in the writings of some of the most eminent souls and liberal minds. When the pendulum will start its full swing then we shall see all such eminent men turn again to God.  (Shoghi Effendi, Lights of Guidance, p. 211)

Today as our reader observed, our society is largely content to go through life without God.

All religions have some form of the “Golden Rule” which guides human relationships, and without it, we’re rudderless.  In the following quote we see the state of the world at the time of Baha’u'llah; and the effect His teachings have had on people:

In the nineteenth century strife and hostility prevailed among the people of the Orient. Apathy and ignorance characterized the nations. They were indeed gloomy and dark, negligent of God and under the subjection of the baser instincts and passions of mankind. The struggle for existence was intense and universal. At such a time as this Bahá’u'lláh appeared among them like a luminary in the heavens. He flooded the East with light. He proclaimed new principles and teachings. He laid a basis for new institutions which are the very spirit of modernism, the light of the world, the development of the body politic and eternal honor.

The souls who hearkened to these teachings among the various oriental nations immediately renounced the spirit of strife and hostility and began to associate in goodwill and fellowship. From extremes of animosity they attained the acme of love and brotherhood. They had been warring and quarreling; now they became loving and lived together in complete unity and agreement.

Among them today you will find no religious, political or patriotic prejudice; they are friendly, loving and associate in the greatest happiness. They have no part in the war and strife which take place in the East; their attitude toward all men is that of goodwill and loving-kindness. A standard of universal peace has been unfurled among them. The light of guidance has flooded their souls. It is light upon light, love upon love.

This is the education and training of Bahá’u'lláh. He has led these souls to this standard and given them teachings which ensure eternal illumination. Anyone who becomes well versed in His teachings will say, “Verily, I declare that these words constitute the illumination of humanity, that this is the everlasting honor, that these are heavenly precepts and the cause of never-ending life among men.  (Abdu’l-Baha, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 401)

As the effects of the Revelation of Baha’u'llah begin to permeate the consciousness of the world, we’ll see God put back into the equation. Without God in the equation, none of our relationships can be as strong as they could be; and in fact the glue that holds them together is not strong enough to hold.

But the love which sometimes exists between friends is not (true) love, because it is subject to transmutation; this is merely fascination. As the breeze blows, the slender trees yield. If the wind is in the East the tree leans to the West, and if the wind turns to the West the tree leans to the East. This kind of love is originated by the accidental conditions of life. This is not love, it is merely acquaintanceship; it is subject to change.   Today you will see two souls apparently in close friendship; tomorrow all this may be changed. Yesterday they were ready to die for one another, today they shun one another’s society! This is not love; it is the yielding of the hearts to the accidents of life. When that which has caused this “love” to exist passes, the love passes also; this is not in reality love. (‘Abdu’l-Bahá: Paris Talks, pp. 179-181)

In her diary, Juliet Thompson quotes ‘Abdu’l-Bahá as using this analogy:

Now associate with good people. You must try to associate with those who will do you good and who will be the cause of your being more awakened, and not with those who will make you negligent of God. For example, if one goes into a garden and associates with flowers, one will surely inhale the beautiful fragrance, but if one goes to a place where there are bad-scented plants, it is sure he will inhale an unpleasant odour. In short, I mean that you will try to be with those who are purified and sanctified souls. Man must always associate with those from whom he can get light, or be with those to whom he can give light. He must either receive or give instructions. Otherwise, being with people without these two intentions, he is spending his time for nothing, and, by so doing, he is neither gaining nor causing others to gain.  (The Diary of Juliet Thompson)

‘Abdu’l-Bahá further tells us the difference between associating with those who have God in their hearts:

True friends are even as skilled physicians, and the Teachings of God are as healing balm, a medicine for the conscience of man. They clear the head, so that a man can breathe them in and delight in their sweet fragrance. They waken those who sleep. They bring awareness to the unheeding, and a portion to the outcast, and to the hopeless, hope.  (‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Selections from the Writings of ‘Abdu’l-Bahá, p. 23)

He further tells us:

When any souls grow to be true believers, they will attain a spiritual relationship with one another, and show forth a tenderness which is not of this world. They will, all of them, become elated from a draught of divine love, and that union of theirs, that connection, will also abide forever. Souls, that is, who will consign their own selves to oblivion, strip from themselves the defects of humankind, and unchain themselves from human bondage, will beyond any doubt be illumined with the heavenly splendours of oneness, and will all attain unto real union in the world that dieth not.  (‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Selections from the Writings of ‘Abdu’l-Bahá, p. 84-85)

Without the love of God in our hearts, we will never be able to attain the standard the Faith sets before us for turning strangers into friends:

One of the teachings is that love and faithfulness must so prevail in the hearts that men may see the stranger as a friend, the sinner as an intimate fellow, may count enemies as allies, regard foes as loving comrades, call their executioner the giver of life, and consider the denier as a believer and the unbeliever as a faithful one — that is, men must behave in such a manner as may befit the believers, the faithful, the friend and the confidant. If this lamp may shine in a befitting manner in the assemblage of the world you will find that the regions will become fragrant and the world will become a delectable paradise, the surface of the earth will become an excellent garden, the world will become as one home, the different nations will become as one kind, and the peoples and nationalities of the East and West will become as one household. I hope such a day will come and such lights may dawn and such a Countenance may appear in the utmost beauty.  (‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Baha’i Scriptures, p. 479)

Spiritual relationships endure through all the worlds of God:

Bodily relationships may pass; even two sisters may be inimical to each other, but the spiritual relationship is eternal, and brings about mutual love and service.  (‘Abdu’l-Bahá, ‘Abdu’l-Bahá in London, p. 75)

Marriage should lead to a profound friendship of spirit, which will endure in the next world, where there is no sex, and no giving and taking in marriage; just the way we should establish with our parents, our children, our brothers and sisters and friends deep spiritual bond which will be ever-lasting, and not merely physical bonds of human relationship.  (Shoghi Effendi, Lights of Guidance, p. 206)

As we know from the short obligatory prayer, the purpose of every soul in this world is to know and worship God;

I bear witness, O my God, that Thou hast created me to know Thee and to worship Thee. (Baha’u'llah, Baha’i Prayers, p. 3)

When we say this prayer every day, and strive to implement it in our own lives, we can’t help but draw closer to God.

We also know that even after death, all souls continue to progress towards God.

And now concerning thy question regarding the soul of man and its survival after death. Know thou of a truth that the soul, after its separation from the body, will continue to progress until it attaineth the presence of God, in a state and condition which neither the revolution of ages and centuries, nor the changes and chances of this world, can alter. It will endure as long as the Kingdom of God, His sovereignty, His dominion and power will endure. It will manifest the signs of God and His attributes, and will reveal His loving kindness and bounty.  (Bahá’u’lláh, Gleanings from the Writings of Bahá’u’lláh, p. 155-156)

Obviously there are many paths to God, and it’s even been said that “there are not atheists in foxholes”, meaning that when the tests get most severe, even an atheist will reach out to God.   God doesn’t distinguish between Bahá’í or non-Bahá’í.  Even when relationships are strained in this world, there is hope for closeness in the next world:

Are not all the people in that world the creatures of God? Therefore, in that world also they can make progress. As here they can receive light by their supplications, there also they can plead for forgiveness and receive light through entreaties and supplications. Thus as souls in this world, through the help of the supplications, the entreaties and the prayers of the holy ones, can acquire development, so is it the same after death. Through their own prayers and supplications they can also progress, more especially when they are the object of the intercession of the Holy Manifestations.  (Adib Taherzadeh, The Covenant of Bahá’u’lláh, p. 17)

Those of us who are Bahá’í know that spiritual relationships are stronger than blood relationships:

The friends should … draw closer to each other, knowing that they form one spiritual family, closer to each other, in the sight of God, than those united by ties of blood.  (From a letter written on behalf of Shoghi Effendi, 8 May, 1948).

This doesn’t mean that we won’t see our non-Bahá’í loved ones in the next world.  Far from it, as ‘Abdu’l-Bahá tells us:

A love that one may have entertained for any one will not be forgotten in the world of the Kingdom. (‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Tablets of ‘Abdu’l-Bahá v1, p. 205-206)

When family members are focused on God, there is more likely to be unity in a family, which will have a positive effect on the whole family:

Note ye how easily, where unity existeth in a given family, the affairs of that family are conducted; what progress the members of that family make, how they prosper in the world. Their concerns are in order, they enjoy comfort and tranquility, they are secure, their position is assured, they come to be envied by all.  (‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Selections from the Writings of ‘Abdu’l-Bahá, p. 278)

On a practical level, Baha’u'llah gives us some guidance on how we can do this:

If any differences arise amongst you, behold Me standing before your face, and overlook the faults of one another for My name’s sake and as a token of your love for My manifest and resplendent Cause.  (Baha’u'llah, Gleanings from the Writings of Baha’u'llah, p. 315)

Forming friendships with those who think they can do it without God are to be avoided as a protection to ourselves:

Expect not that they who violate the ordinances of God will be trustworthy or sincere in the faith they profess. Avoid them, and preserve strict guard over thyself, lest their devices and mischief hurt thee. Turn away from them, and fix thy gaze upon God, thy Lord, the All-Glorious, the Most Bountiful. He that giveth up himself wholly to God, God shall, assuredly, be with him; and he that placeth his complete trust in God, God shall, verily, protect him from whatsoever may harm him, and shield him from the wickedness of every evil plotter.”
(Baha’u'llah, The Summons of the Lord of Hosts, p. 210)

A good test you can use is to ask yourself:  after I have contact with this person, is my faith strengthened or weakened? Is my commitment to the laws of God strengthened or weakened?

Then act accordingly.

When we take Baha’u'llah’s injunctions seriously and to seek the company of the righteous, we will draw closer to God; have more unified relationships; and ensure happiness in all the worlds of God.

 

I think that’s a good reason to put God at the core of all of our relationships.  What do you think?

 

Click here to read “Primary Relationships”

 

 

 

  Recently a reader wrote asking for suggestions of how to get closer to his mother and how to have his new found love accept him as a Baha’i.  This caused me to reflect on the nature of our primary relationships and how to get clear about them.  Hope my response to him helps you [...]

 

Recently a reader wrote asking for suggestions of how to get closer to his mother and how to have his new found love accept him as a Baha’i.  This caused me to reflect on the nature of our primary relationships and how to get clear about them.  Hope my response to him helps you too.

I wrote:

As a mother myself, your desire to be close to your mother warms my heart!

There are some clues on what you can do for her in this quote:

Also a father and mother endure the greatest troubles and hardships for their children; and often when the children have reached the age of maturity, the parents pass on to the other world. Rarely does it happen that a father and mother in this world see the reward of the care and trouble they have undergone for their children. Therefore, children, in return for this care and trouble, must show forth charity and beneficence, and must implore pardon and forgiveness for their parents. So you ought, in return for the love and kindness shown you by your father, to give to the poor for his sake, with greatest submission and humility implore pardon and remission of sins, and ask for the supreme mercy.  (Adib Taherzadeh, The Covenant of Bahá’u’lláh, p. 17)

From this quote we see that there are two concrete things you can do:

1. Implore pardon and forgiveness for her sins.  You can do it by remembering that:

It is seemly that the servant should, after each prayer, supplicate God to bestow mercy and forgiveness upon his parents. Thereupon God’s call will be raised: ‘Thousand upon thousand of what thou hast asked for thy parents shall be thy recompense!’ Blessed is he who remembereth his parents when communing with God.  (The Báb, Lights of Guidance, p. 230)

And you can use this prayer when praying for her:

O Lord! In this Most Great Dispensation Thou dost accept the intercession of children in behalf of their parents. This is one of the special infinite bestowals of this Dispensation. Therefore, O Thou kind Lord, accept the request of this Thy servant at the threshold of Thy singleness and submerge his father in the ocean of Thy grace, because this son hath arisen to render Thee service and is exerting effort at all times in the pathway of Thy love, Verily, Thou art the Giver, the Forgiver and the Kind!  (‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Bahá’í Prayers, p. 64)

2. Give to the poor in her name

Click here for some good stories of generosity which might inspire you.

Other things you can do:

3. You can also thank God (and your mother) for giving birth to you:

It behooveth man, upon reaching the age of nineteen, to render thanksgiving for the day of his conception as an embryo. For had the embryo not existed, how could he have reached his present state? (The Báb, Selections from the Writings of the Báb, p. 89)

I don’t know how old you are, but it doesn’t matter, since there is no age in the spiritual world.

There are many wonderful prayers for forgiveness.  God’s forgiveness is boundless!  Hopefully you can find one that resonates with you:

Forgiveness

Forgiveness for Others

Forgiveness – from Man to God

Any one of these prayers would be good to study with a trusted friend, or even your Mother if she is open to it.

 

Having said that, I have 2 concerns about your desire to be closer to your mother than anyone else.

First:  Our primary relationship should always be towards God.

Advance always in the Kingdom of Bahá’u’lláh; occupy thy heart always by the mentioning of Bahá’u’lláh; take heed that only in your eyes is Bahá’u’lláh, in your heart is Bahá’u’lláh—in your inmost heart is Bahá’u’lláh!  (Bahá’í Scriptures, p. 501)

As it says in the short obligatory prayer:

I bear witness, O my God, that Thou hast created me to know Thee and to worship Thee . . .  (Bahá’u'lláh, Short Obligatory Prayer, Baha’i Prayers, p. 3)

Remember the Bahá’í marriage vow:  “We will all, verily, abide by the will of God”.  Ultimately, this is our whole purpose in life.  To know God and to worship Him is all about abiding by His will.

It’s easy, when life throws us a curveball, to get distracted and forget how to know and worship God.  Ask yourself:

• Are you continuing to pray and read the Writings morning and night?
• Are you giving sacrificially to the fund?
• Is your Right of God up to date?
• Are you teaching the Faith and finding ways to be of service to others every day?

If you have weaknesses in any of these areas, there are veils between you and God that can be removed.  Focus all your attention on strengthening your relationship to God, and you WILL draw closer to both your mother and the love of your life.

I find this picture helps me remember:  If you and the other person are directed towards God, the distance between you will automatically be less.

 

 
When our primary focus is directed towards Him, He will take care of everything else in your life, as we see in the following quote!

I swear by God, should the traveller in the path of salvation and the seeker for the summits of righteousness attain to this supreme and lofty state, he will inhale the fragrance of the True One from remote distances and discern the brilliant morn of guidance from the Day-springs of all things. Every atom and object will direct him to the Beloved and the Desired One.

He will become so discerning that he will distinguish truth from falsehood as the sun from shadow. For example; if the breeze of truth should blow forth from the east of creation, he will surely inhale it in the west of emanation.

Likewise, he will distinguish all the signs of the True One—such as wonderful words, incomparable deeds, and brilliant actions—from the deeds, actions and traces of all else, just as the jeweller distinguishes the gem from the stone, and man the spring from autumn and heat from cold.

When the head of the soul is purified from the ailment (lit. cold) of the contingent and existent, it will unfailingly discover the fragrance of the Beloved from distant stations, arrive at the city of the assurance of His Highness the Beneficent, through the effect of this fragrance, and behold the wonders of the wisdom of His Highness the Most Holy, in that spiritual city.

It will detect the hidden knowledges from the forms of the leaves of the tree of that city, hear the glorification and praise of the Lord of Lords from its soil, with the outward and inward ears, and perceive the mysteries of “advent” and “return” with the outward eye.

What shall we mention of the signs, tokens, appearances and splendors ordained in that city, by the command of the King of Names and Attributes! It quencheth thirst without water, and increaseth the heat of the love of God without fire.

The ideal consummate wisdom is hidden in every plant, and a thousand nightingales of speech are in ecstasy and rapture upon every rose branch. The mystery of the fire of Moses is revealed in its wonderful tulips, and the breath of the Holy Spirit of Jesus emanates from its fragrances of holiness.

It bestows wealth without gold and grants immortality without death. A paradise is concealed in every leaf, and a hundred thousand wisdoms are treasured in every one of its chambers.

Those who earnestly endeavor in the way of God, after severance from all else, will become so attached to that city that they will not abandon it for an instant. They will hear conclusive proofs from the hyacinth of that assembly and will receive clear arguments from the beauty of the rose and the melody of the nightingale.

This city is renewed and adorned every one thousand years, more or less. Therefore, O my friends, we must make an efforts to attain to that city and remove the veils of glory, through divine favors and lordly compassion, so that we may sacrifice the withered soul in the path of the New Beloved, and show forth a hundred thousand supplications and humiliations in order to be favored with that attainment.  (Bahá’í Scriptures, p. 51-52)

Second:  you mention having a “new found love”.  If you marry, the two of you will be creating a divinely-created institution; a fortress for well-being and salvation with someone who will be with you through all the worlds of God.

The Lord, peerless is He, hath made woman and man to abide with each other in the closest companionship, and to be even as a single soul. They are two helpmates, two intimate friends, who should be concerned about the welfare of each other.  If they live thus, they will pass through this world with perfect contentment, bliss, and peace of heart, and become the object of Divine grace and favour in the Kingdom of heaven . . . Strive, then, to abide, heart and soul, with each other as two doves in the nest, for this is to be blessed in both worlds.  (Abdu’l-Bahá, Selections from the Writings of Abdu’l-Bahá, p. 122)

You notice there is no room for your mother in this nest!

Although your Mother will always be the person who gave you birth, and you will have contact with her in the next world, she will not be with you in the fortress you create with your wife, so the relationship with your wife should come second to your relationship to God.

And know thou for a certainty, that in the divine worlds, the spiritual beloved ones (believers) will recognize each other, and will seek union (with each other), but a spiritual union. Likewise, a love that one may have entertained for any one will not be forgotten in the world of the Kingdom.  (‘Abdul-Bahá, Tablets of ‘Abdul-Bahá, V1, p. 205)

When two people, husband and wife for instance, have been completely united in this life their souls being as one soul, then after one of them has passed away, this union of heart and soul would remain unbroken. (Abdu’l-Bahá, Abdu’l-Bahá in London, p. 75)

Here is a quote which shows that your marriage should take priority over everything else:

In considering the problems that you and your wife are experiencing, the House of Justice points out that the unity of your family should take priority over any other consideration. (Universal House of Justice, The Compilation of Compilations vol II, p. 453)

And that marriage takes work:

The House of Justice feels it most essential for your husband and you to understand that marriage can be a source of well-being, conveying a sense of security and spiritual happiness. However, it is not something that just happens. For marriage to become a haven of contentment it requires the cooperation of the marriage partners themselves, and the assistance of their families.  (Universal House of Justice, The Compilation of Compilations vol II, p. 453)

If the person you marry is not a Bahá’í, you may have to limit your participation in Bahá’í activities in order to maintain unity in your family:

A Bahá’í who is married to a non-Bahá’í may well have to limit his activities to same degree in order to maintain the unity of his family. (Universal House of Justice, Lights of Guidance, p. 86)

Lastly, here’s a prayer which can assist you to be the person God wants you to be:

I beg Thee to forgive me, O my Lord, for every mention but the mention of Thee, and for every praise but the praise of Thee, and for every delight but delight in Thy nearness, and for every pleasure but the pleasure of communion with Thee, and for every joy but the joy of Thy love and of Thy good-pleasure, and for all things pertaining unto me which bear no relationship unto Thee, O Thou Who art the Lord of lords, He Who provideth the means and unlocketh the doors.
(The Báb, Bahá’í Prayers, p. 79)

Say it, and study it for clues about how to orient your life, and it will surely help you!

How has this helped you understand relationships better?  Post your comments here:

 

 

 

 

    Click Here for Introductory Music:     The Bahá’í New Year (or Naw Ruz, which means “new day”), is the only Baha’i Holy Day with no direct relation to the life of a Messenger of God.  Like the ancient Persian New Year, it’s associated with the spring equinox, that first day of the [...]

 

 

Click Here for Introductory Music:

 

 

The Bahá’í New Year (or Naw Ruz, which means “new day”), is the only Baha’i Holy Day with no direct relation to the life of a Messenger of God.  Like the ancient Persian New Year, it’s associated with the spring equinox, that first day of the re-awakening of the planet. It is a time when the icy snows of winter have melted away and the first shoots of the flowers are just beginning to peek through. It is a time when the birds are just beginning to re-appear after their months down south.

The Festival of Naw Ruz marks the end of the month of fasting and is a joyous time of celebration. It is a Bahá’í Holy Day on which work is to be suspended.

Did you know that Naw Ruz is the only holiday celebrated by more than one religious group?

Some people claim that Naw-Ruz dates as far back as 15,000 years — before the last ice age, while others claim that it was founded by Zoroaster. Today, the festival is celebrated in many countries that were territories of, or influenced by, the Persian Empire: Iran, Kurdistan, parts of the Middle East, as well as in the former Soviet republics of Tajikistan, Uzbekistan, Azerbaijan, Turkmenistan, Kazakhstan, and Kyrgyzstan. It is also celebrated by Persians living in Pakistan, Zanzibar, Turkey, Iraq, Albania, northwestern China and parts of the Indian subcontinent.

In Afghanistan during the reign of the Taliban, Naw Ruz was banned until 2001 where it came back as popular as it was before the Taliban.

It is also a holy day for Ismailis, Alawites, and Alevis (branches of the Shiite Moslem religion). The Jewish festival of Purim is probably adopted from the Persian New Year. Naw-Ruz is celebrated rather like the Christian Easter, with many symbols indicating spring and renewal.

Persians believe that Naw Ruz marks the first day when the universe started its motion. Moslems believe it’s a day in which many events of great religious significance took place. Among them God’s first covenant with mankind, the first rising of the sun, the grounding of Noah’s ark on Ararat, Gabriel’s first appearance to Muhammad, the destruction of the idols in the holy Sanctuary at Mecca, Muhammad’s appointment of `Ali as His successor, the appearance of the Qa’im, and the final triumph of the Qa’im over the Antichrist. Such traditions echoed similar accounts of Naw-Ruz found in Zoroastrian literature. In the northern hemisphere Naw-Rúz marks the coming of spring.

In the Bahá’í Faith, the Báb called the first day of his new calendar “the Day of God”. The remaining eighteen days of the first month were associated with the eighteen Letters of the Living, hence the Báb’s apostles imagined a celebration that would last nineteen days.  Bahá’u’lláh, adopted the new calendar proposed by the Báb, and the use of Naw-Rúz as a festival for those who observed the fast.

As with all Bahá’í holy days, there are few fixed rules for observing Naw-Rúz. Bahá’ís all over the world celebrate it according to local custom.

During the time of the Báb, throughout the night of Naw-Ruz each believer was to recite 361 times the verse: “God beareth witness that there is no God but Him, the Ineffable, the Self-Subsistent”, and during the day: “God beareth witness that there is no God but Him, the Precious, the Beloved”.

Persians start preparing for Naw Ruz with a major spring-cleaning of their houses, the purchase of new clothes and flowers (hyacinths and tulips are popular). They believe that whatever a person does on Naw Ruz will affect the rest of the year. So, if a person is warm and kind to their relatives, friends and neighbors on that day, then the new year will be a good one. On the other hand, if there are fights and disagreements, the year will be a bad one.

The most joyful time for a Naw-Ruz celebration is at sunset on the last day of the Fast. It seems almost directed by Baha’u’llah that it should be this way:

O Pen of the Most High! Say: O people of the world! We have enjoined upon you fasting during a brief period, and at its close have designated for you Naw-Ruz as a feast. (Baha’u’llah, Kitab-i-Aqdas, p. 24)

`Abdu’l-Bahá, explained the significance of Naw-Rúz in terms of spring and the new life it brings. As the fast ended, He said, they could turn a new page in their lives, inspired to right action and spiritual excellence.

Soon the whole world, as in springtime, will change its garb. The turning and falling of the autumn leaves is past; the bleakness of the winter time is over. The new year hath appeared and the spiritual springtime is at hand. The black earth is becoming a verdant garden; the deserts and mountains are teeming with red flowers; from the borders of the wilderness the tall grasses are standing like advance guards before the cypress and jessamine trees; while the birds are singing among the rose branches like the angels in the highest heavens, announcing the glad-tidings of the approach of that spiritual spring, and the sweet music of their voices is causing the real essence of all things to move and quiver. (Abdu’l-Baha, Baha’i World Faith, p. 351)

Here’s a New Year’s story you may not have heard before, about the remains of the Bab, (the forerunner of Baha’ullah) finally being laid to rest:

On the [day] of the first Naw-Ruz (1909), which He celebrated after His release from His confinement, ‘Abdu’l-Bahá had the marble sarcophagus transported with great labor to the vault prepared for it, and in the evening, by the light of a single lamp, He laid within it, with His own hands — in the presence of believers from the East and from the West and in circumstances at once solemn and moving – the wooden casket containing the sacred remains of the Báb and His companion.  When all was finished, and the earthly remains of the Martyr-Prophet of Shiraz were, at long last, safely deposited for their everlasting rest in the bosom of God’s holy mountain, ‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Who had cast aside His turban, removed His shoes and thrown off His cloak, bent low over the still open sarcophagus, His silver hair waving about His head and His face transfigured and luminous, rested His forehead on the border of the wooden casket, and, sobbing aloud, wept with such a weeping that all those who were present wept with Him. That night He could not sleep, so overwhelmed was He with emotion.  The most joyful tidings is this,” He wrote later in a Tablet announcing to His followers the news of this glorious victory, “that the holy, the luminous body of the Báb … after having for sixty years been transferred from place to place, by reason of the ascendancy of the enemy, and from fear of the malevolent, and having known neither rest nor tranquillity has, through the mercy of the Abhá Beauty, been ceremoniously deposited, on the day of Naw-Rúz, within the sacred casket, in the exalted Shrine on Mt. Carmel… By a strange coincidence, on that same day of Naw-Rúz, a cablegram was received from Chicago, announcing that the believers in each of the American centers had elected a delegate and sent to that city … and definitely decided on the site and construction of the Mashriqu’l-Adhkar.  (Shoghi Effendi, God Passes By, p. 276)

 Click here to listen to an Arabic Chant of the Naw Ruz Prayer:

 The Divine Springtime is come, O Most Exalted Pen, for the Festival of the All-Merciful is fast approaching. Bestir thyself, and magnify, before the entire creation, the name of God, and celebrate His praise, in such wise that all created things may be regenerated and made new.  (Baha’u'llah, Gleanings from the Writings of Baha’u'llah, p. 27)

 This is the Day, O my Lord, whose brightness Thou hast exalted above the brightness of the sun and the splendors thereof… This is the Day whereon the hopeless have been clothed with the raiment of confidence, and the sick attired with the robe of healing, and the poor drawn nigh unto the ocean of Thy riches. (Baha’u'llah, Prayers and Meditations, p. 273)

 If we are not happy and joyous at this season, for what other season shall we wait and for what other time shall we look? This is the time for growing; the season for joyous gathering! Take the cup of the Testament in thy hand; leap and dance with ecstasy in the triumphal procession of the Covenant! Lay your confidence in the everlasting bounty, turn to the presence of the generous God; ask assistance from the Kingdom of Abhá; seek confirmation from the Supreme World; turn thy vision to the horizon of eternal wealth; and pray for help from the Source of Mercy! (Abdu’l-Bahá, Baha’i World Faith, p. 351)

Here is the same prayer as chanted earlier, this time in English:

Praised be Thou, O my God, that Thou hast ordained Naw-Rúz as a festival unto those who have observed the Fast for love of Thee and abstained from all that is abhorrent unto thee.  Grant, O my Lord, that the fire of Thy love and the heat produced by the Fast enjoined by Thee may inflame them in Thy Cause, and make them to be occupied with Thy praise and with remembrance of Thee.

Since thou hast adorned them, O my Lord, with the ornament of the Fast prescribed by Thee, do Thou adorn them also with the ornament of Thine acceptance, through Thy grace and bountiful favor.  For the doings of men are all dependent upon Thy good-pleasure, and are conditioned by Thy behest.  Shouldst Thou regard him who hath broken the Fast as one who hath observed it, such a man would be reckoned among them who from eternity had been keeping the Fast.  And shouldst Thou decree that he who hath observed the Fast hath broken it, that person would be numbered with such as have caused the Robe of Thy Revelation to be stained with dust, and been far removed from the crystal waters of this living Fountain.

Thou art He through Whom the ensign “Praiseworthy art Thou in Thy works” hath been lifted up, and the standard “Obeyed art Thou in Thy behest” hath been unfurled.  Make known this Thy station, O my God, unto Thy servants, that they may be made aware that the excellence of all things is dependent upon Thy bidding and Thy word, and the virtue of every act is conditioned by Thy leave and the good pleasure of Thy will, and may recognize that the reins of men’s doings are within the grasp of Thine acceptance and Thy commandment.  Make this known unto them, that nothing whatsoever may shut them out from Thy Beauty, in these days whereon the Christ exclaimeth: “All dominion is Thine, O Thou the Begetter of the Spirit (Jesus)”; and Thy Friend (Muhammad) crieth out: “Glory be to Thee, O Thou the Best-Beloved, for that Thou hast uncovered Thy Beauty, and written down for Thy chosen ones what will cause them to attain unto the seat of the revelation of Thy Most Great Name, through which all the peoples have lamented except such as have detached themselves from all else except Thee, and set themselves towards Him Who is the Revealer of Thyself and the Manifestation of Thine attributes.”

He Who is Thy Branch and all Thy company, O my Lord, have broken this day their fast, after having observed it within the precincts of Thy court, and in their eagerness to please Thee.  Do Thou ordain for Him, and for them, and for all such as have entered Thy presence in those days all the good Thou didst destine in Thy Book.  Supply them, then, with that which will profit them, in both this life and in the life beyond.  Thou, in truth, art the All-Knowing, the All-Wise.

Click Here for the Closing Music:

 

Thank you all for coming!  Please enjoy the rest of the evening!

By Marian   I had a good session with my counsellor this week. These sessions often inspire me to do research either in a book or online – I use Ocean a fair bit when inspired to find something. So I was thinking about the Hidden Word that says; “Thy heart is My home, sanctify [...]

By Marian

 

I had a good session with my counsellor this week. These sessions often inspire me to do research either in a book or online – I use Ocean a fair bit when inspired to find something. So I was thinking about the Hidden Word that says;

“Thy heart is My home, sanctify it for My descent…”  (Baha’u'llah, Hidden Words, Arabic 59)

I also found a reference in Paris Talks that used “purify” instead of “sanctify”. So I got out my 1924 edition of the “Pocket Oxford Dictionary” It was my mother’s mother’s and I figured the definitions would have been close to the ones used by Shoghi Effendi since he was educated at Oxford – it says ‘sanctify’ means:

 consecrate (make sacred – devote to purpose), make holy, free from sin.

‘Purify’ means:

 to make pure or cleanse, make ceremonially clean, clear of foreign elements.

(In the online Oxford Advanced Learner’s Edition, it just says ‘sanctify’ means to make holy. ‘Purify’ means to purify somebody/something/yourself; to make somebody pure by removing evil from their souls.  Hindus purify themselves by bathing in the river Ganges to purify the soul.

Well, we know evil means our lower nature, or in this case, the qualities of our lower nature.  Also when I think of sanctifying my heart, it means getting rid of those emotions that I have buried there. According to Patricia Romano McGraw in her book It’s not your Fault:  How Healing Relationships Change Your Brain and Can Help You Overcome a Painful Past, I need to attune to these emotions … that is the hard part for me – digging them up, becoming aware of them on a deeper level than I am. I’m not releasing them yet – well only slightly. Patience – they have been buried a long time…

Then I started looking up the other references that popped up in Ocean under “Thy heart is My home”. In the Seven Valleys, He says:

“O friend, the heart is the dwelling of eternal mysteries, make it not the home of fleeting fancies; waste not the treasure of thy precious life in employment with this swiftly passing world. Thou comest from the world of holiness — bind not thine heart to the earth; thou art a dweller in the court of nearness — choose not the homeland of the dust.”  (Baha’u'llah, The Seven Valleys, p. 34)

Then I wanted to find something about the heart being the seat of our emotions and I found this fascinating article

So, where, you may ask, am I going with this. Well, if the heart is the seat of our emotions- and to my understanding, these quotes agree with that…:

“When man’s soul is rarefied and cleansed, spiritual links are established, and from these bonds sensations felt by the heart are produced. The human heart resembleth a mirror. When this is purified human hearts are attuned and reflect one another, and thus spiritual emotions are generated.”   (Abdu’l-Bahá, Selections from the Writings of Abdu’l-Bahá, p. 108)

“The natural emotions are blameworthy and are like rust which deprives the heart of the bounties of God.”  (Abdu’l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 244)

“The emotions that have possessed my grieving heart are such that they cannot be put into words, and tongue and pen are helpless to describe them.”  (Compilations, Bahiyyih Khanum, p. 49)

So what are the natural emotions?  In the Writings it says what the divine emotions are:

“These are the divine appearances, the heavenly bounties, the sublime emotions, the love and knowledge of God; universal wisdom, intellectual perception, scientific discoveries, justice, equity, truthfulness, benevolence, natural courage and innate fortitude; the respect for rights and the keeping of agreements and covenants; rectitude in all circumstances; serving the truth under all conditions; the sacrifice of one’s life for the good of all people; kindness and esteem for all nations; obedience to the teachings of God; service in the Divine Kingdom; the guidance of the people, and the education  of the nations and races. This is the prosperity of the human world! This is the exaltation of man in the world! This is eternal life and heavenly honor!   (Abdu’l-Bahá, Some Answered Questions, p. 79-80)

“… sincerity, justice, humility, severance, and love for the believers of God will purify the mirror and make it radiant with reflected rays from the Sun of Truth.”  (Abdu’l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 244)

“There can be no doubt that whoever is cognizant of this truth, is cleansed and sanctified from all pride, arrogance, and vainglory.”  (Compilations, The Compilation of Compilations vol. I, p. 77)

 That last quote tells us of three, and then the qualities that make someone a tyrant, a traitor or a thief would also be natural emotions.

…then I need to cleanse my heart of the negative emotions that lay buried there because of the injuries sustained by the tyrants in my past, before it can truly become free to be God’s home. I guess some of those emotions include anger, sadness, self-pity…

And I need to create a much better healthy relationship with God – attune to God – through prayer and meditation.

Did I tell you how this process seemed to start while on pilgrimage – yes I think I did, and as my counsellor said – the starting of making chinks in my armour that has kept my emotions buried. And the work is going slowly, but I’m getting impatient! I have a great coping mechanism – my intellect, according to my counsellor, at keeping my emotions buried, I’ve used it to minimize my abuse – minimizing how devastating it has been.

Thank you Baha’u'llah for allowing me to recognise You, to have saved me from so much I could have suffered from if I hadn’t found the Faith.

 

    By Elizabeth Rochester   Over the years, my experience has been that Baha’is from Iran have a much deeper and more intense response to stories of the martyrs than do people, even Baha’is,  from the West.  There is a deep grief combined with an undying admiration; there is nothing negative or guarded in [...]

Over the years, from reading the prayers of Baha’u’llah, I came to a different and deeper understanding of the words of Jesus.   I had never understood His cry from the cross “..why hast thou forsaken me?”¹; I was aware that many thought it was His “human side”, reluctant to die, but that never seemed real to me or consistent with the rest of His life.  However, when I read Baha’u’llah’s words: “How long wilt Thou forsake  me.  Lift me up to Thee, I pray Thee.”²  I came to understand that, by being “forsaken” both Jesus and Baha’u’llah meant that they were still alive and had not been taken to the next world.   They were both asking: “Lift me up to Thee…”

It is against this immense picture of “ruthless carnage” that we are invited, in Book 7 of the Ruhi courses: “Walking Together on a Path of Service” to study the lives and learn to tell the stories of the Seven Martyrs of Tihran.  Who were these people, these wonderful people, who, among many others before and after them, “fed and sustained the flame that glowed in those valiant hearts”?  Is it not amazing that the Baha’i Faith could survive such a loss of all its great leaders but one, Baha’u’llah?

Let us return now to Section 7 of the course where we find these word:

“Story telling is an art which when used properly can inspire, animate, stimulate imagination, convey profound concepts, teach and even lead to change of behavior.”    ( Walking Together on a Path of Service,  p.120)

And let us do our level best to follow the guidance of Shoghi Effendi:

“Utilize, as extensively as you possibly can, the wealth of material which Nabil’s stirring and precious narrative contains, and let it be your chief instrument wherewith you can feed the flame of enthusiasm that glows in every Baha’i heart and upon which the success of your magnificent, your incessant efforts must ultimately depend.”

There is one final note which I would like to add.  It may be possible to contribute, over time, to another hope expressed by Shoghi Effendi:

 ”Shoghi Effendi was very much interested to learn of the success of the `Pageant of Nations’ you reproduced… “It is through such presentations that we can arouse the interest of the greatest number of peoples in the spirit of the Cause.  That day will the Cause spread like wild fire when its spirit and teachings will be presented on the stage or in art and literature as a whole.  Art can better awaken such noble sentiments than cold rationalizing especially among the mass of the people.  (Shoghi Effendi, Lights of Guidance, Page: 98)

“As we grow in our capacity to tell the stories of the heroes of our Faith, perhaps some souls, blessed with the necessary gifts and skills, will be inspired to produce plays and maybe movies and other forms of art.  Let us pray and work for the fulfillment of our Guardian’s prediction: “It is through such presentations that we can arouse the interest of the greatest number of peoples in the spirit of the Cause.”

 

 

 The following posting came to me privately as a comment on the blog posting “How to Eat During the Bahá’í Fast”.  It was too long to include as a comment, so with her permission, I’ve posted it as a blog posting in its own right. By Maria Chouchtari Growing up as a Christian, I always [...]

 The following posting came to me privately as a comment on the blog posting “How to Eat During the Bahá’í Fast”.  It was too long to include as a comment, so with her permission, I’ve posted it as a blog posting in its own right.

By Maria Chouchtari

Growing up as a Christian, I always understood Lent as being a time that we gave up something for the love of God. Mostly we gave up meat. Or as I child we were asked, and the children responded,” I ‘ll give up my candy,” or it was tied to some form of sacrifice even if for a short time. Even someone who would drink alcohol, would give up his wine or beer.

In most cultures and religions there was an element of sacrifice, denial or giving up something precious.   Not just money for the fund but something we went without for the love of God, and a form of spiritual discipline. Still we should not provoke others during this time.  I really did appreciate how you clearly put out there what the Writings do say, but it can be tricky with certain people when they only give incomplete half truths and partial interpretations. I think intolerance is a kind of sin as is prejudice. Again we need to be tolerant but also courteous. So clearly indicated in the Writings, even when refusing food or water.

I find we are being a bit overly self centered, and that needs to change too.  We should be feeling anxiety about all the people in the world who are hungry.  I think about the love of the Yaran, their sacrifices, and imagine them fasting in the discomfort of the prison as did the Holy family in the prison of Akka.

I don’t agree with all the emphasis on getting all the vitamins, this diet and that…  My personal feeling is that if we do get less of something, it is still fine.  I feel in the West we are overly concerned about feeling perfect all the time.  To me it is perfectly alright to suffer some during the fast.  Millions of people around the world barely get a decent meal a day, let alone all their vitamins and minerals.  As one African put it, we are on a constant fast all the time, cause we can’t even afford to eat more than one meal a day. Baha’u'llah lived on rice and a little milk for over two years in the Mountains of Kurdistan, so if we are a little inconvenienced to compensate for all HIS sufferings for a short period, so be it.

Why should we have to feel perfectly nourished during the fast. Why are we so afraid to suffer a little and have things a bit rough?  If we experience some discomfort, so be it. So many people in the world have less to begin with.  Imagine those that live in extreme temperatures (hot) and can’t even drink water, and don’t have air conditioned offices, and yet they are making the sacrifice.  If there is no sacrifice, does it really have the same effect on our soul?  Making life as easy and as comfortable as possible is not how I view fasting time.  It is merely an inconvenience. We are not starving and moderation in all things is required.

There was once a kind of Association that raised even a kind of charity saying, fast for a day and give the money of what you would have spent on food that day to feeding those that have none or the needy. A little sacrifice is good for the soul without being fanatical or self-righteous. There is an enormous amount of waste in society in general.

I think there has been some controversy within some communities about meat and I just wanted to make sure we don’t go overboard.  There are no absolutes within that framework, and certain people equate being a good Baha’i with being vegetarian.

Anyone can say or do whatever they feel is right for them, and in consultation with their doctors.  I do agree with eating more natural foods that the earth provided and unprocessed.  I tend not to buy meat or other products, but if served by my host, I will not refuse it as a courtesy.

Fasting is compared to the Sun and prayer to the moon, so for those who can, imagine the power of the SUN.

I never felt the fast should be about nutrition, but more about having more time for prayer and meditation. The hours we are not eating and drinking, smoking or other…we are thinking about our Creator and detachment from all things, including our diet. We should eat well, I agree, if we can, but if we can’t then for a short time it is still okay.  But again a little rough going is good for the soul and it is the effort that counts.

The spiritual aspects are stated in the writings. They are given to us for our spiritual nourishment.  The fast is about that, not what we put in our mouths or don’t.  But we should assume healthy eating habits whether it is fasting time or not; But the element of some denial to emphasize more the spiritual is really the spiritual benefits. Are we fasting in our thoughts? Are we being kind to others around us?

Although some will point out the scientific physical benefits of a short fast on the body itself, I think that the main reason is to do our inner spring cleaning, both physical, spiritual and have time for meditation and reflection.

It’s not a time to engage in a lot of activities, but breaking the fast together is always uplifting.  Having a fasting buddy, is helpful too. We’re all in it together…Sharing stories, writings, praying.  And we don’t have to be jumping up and down, doing extraneous exercise or other, or take long trips on purpose to avoid it, nor sleep all day or other. But different people cope differently. It is our own soul-searching time.

All day long we are tempted, we lose our patience, we can be cranky, moody and other.. But again a reminder, Fasting is not meant to be easy.

Some people can’t fast in the physical sense and that too is their decision but it is not for us to judge.  It does take a certain kind of willpower and denial. Some function better than others!  God knows who tried and who didn’t regardless of what they did or did not put in their mouth.

Helpful health habits are…the healthier you are to begin with the better who can bear some minor discomforts of fasting, the fatigue that often accompanies the fast. The lack of focus can be dangerous for some. Still we believe we are protected when fasting.

Not being able to drink water in a very hot climate can be dangerous for dehydration. So in the mornings I would fill up like a camel and I would be alright.

But pregnant women, those that are breast-feeding, women during their menstrual cycle, the elderly, children, those who are travelling or walking long distances or doing very hard physical labour are not bound by the fast…and anyone who is sick or wounded … So it is really reasonable, the person in good health is capable of a short fast.  Those that smoke will feel edgy when they don’t have their nicotine…etc. others their caffeine or other…they claim they cannot focus. Some find their focus is better during the fast.

It is truly a personal matter, and for each person to do what they can.  The effort involved and the sacrifice and knowing that God knows truly whether we fasted or not.

The prayer says it clearly.

I also think about the needy and homeless and others who do without on a daily basis.  Feeling somewhat hungry reminds me of all those that have not. For myself, food not the issue, but fatigue can become, from lack of sleep…so special time despite the discomforts.  Getting enough rest helps the physical aspects of running on low…

The day my children had sports at school and had to run in the heat…they came home saying sorry Mom, I had to drink water…I just couldn’t …but they didn’t eat food but felt they had broken the fast…but for a reason. The heat was unbearable as was their requirement to pass those exams.  I would tell them God understands.

 

 

I first heard this story in a group for Adult Children of Alcoholics, nearly 25 years ago, and was delighted to find it again tonight.  If you aren’t familiar with it, I hope you enjoy it!  If you are, I hope you enjoy reading it again.   An Autobiography in Five Short Chapters A poem [...]

I first heard this story in a group for Adult Children of Alcoholics, nearly 25 years ago, and was delighted to find it again tonight.  If you aren’t familiar with it, I hope you enjoy it!  If you are, I hope you enjoy reading it again.

 

An Autobiography in Five Short Chapters

A poem by Portia Nelson that appears in Claudia Black’s book. Repeat After Me

I

I walk down the street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I fall in

I am lost . . . I am helpless.

It isn’t my fault.

It takes forever to find a way out.

II

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I pretend I don’t see it.

I fall in again.

I can’t believe I am in the same place.

But it isn’t my fault.

It still takes a long time to get out.

III

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I see it is there.

I still fall in . . . it’s a habit.

My eyes are open.

I know where I am.

It is my fault.

I get out immediately.

IV

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I walk around it.

V

I walk down another street.

 

 

Put the Glass Down By Dr.Claude Shema-Rutagengwa, Pr.Dr.Udaya Kumar and Pr.Dr.Dietrich http://www.author-me.com/fict07/puttheglass.htm Once a professor began his class by holding up a glass with some water in it. He held it up for all to see and asked the students, “how much do you think this glass weighs? ’50gms!’?…’100gms…’125gms’…. The students answered, “I really don’t [...]

Put the Glass Down

By Dr.Claude Shema-Rutagengwa, Pr.Dr.Udaya Kumar and Pr.Dr.Dietrich

http://www.author-me.com/fict07/puttheglass.htm

Once a professor began his class by holding up a glass with some water in it. He held it up for all to see and asked the students, “how much do you think this glass weighs? ’50gms!’?…’100gms…’125gms’….

The students answered, “I really don’t know unless I weigh it.”

The professor said, ‘now, my question is: What would happen if I held it up like this for a few minutes?’

‘Nothing’ the students said.

“OK what would happen if I held it up like this for an hour?” the professor asked.

“Your arm would begin to ache” said one of the students.

“You’re right, now what would happen if I held it for a day?”

“Your arm could go numb; you might have severe muscle stress & paralysis; have to go to hospital for sure! Ventured another student”, all the students laughed.

“Very good. But during all this, did the weight of the glass change?” Asked the professor.

“No” was the reply of all the students.

“Then what caused the arm to ache; the muscle to stress?” After a pause the professor asked “Before my arm ache, what should I do?”

The students were puzzled.

“Put the glass down!” said one of the students.

“Exactly!” said the professor, “Life’s problems are exactly like this. Hold it for a few minutes in your head; they seem OK. Think of them for a long time; they begin to ache. Hold it even longer; they begin to paralyze you. You will not be able to do anything.”

It’s important to think of the challenges (problems) in your life, but EVEN MORE IMPORTANT to ‘put them down’ at the end of every day before you go to sleep. That way, you are not stressed, you wake up every day fresh; strong; can handle any issue, any challenge that comes your way!

Remember to put the glass down everyday!

 

  Recently someone asked me about what the Baha’i Faith has to say about near-death experiences.  I don’t have any knowledge on this topic, but a quick search indicated that a lot of Baha’is had written and spoken about it.  As a result, I decided to put together a list of resources, which could easily [...]

 

Recently someone asked me about what the Baha’i Faith has to say about near-death experiences.  I don’t have any knowledge on this topic, but a quick search indicated that a lot of Baha’is had written and spoken about it.  As a result, I decided to put together a list of resources, which could easily be accessed by those interested in this topic.  If you know of others, please let me know and I’ll include them.

To access more information on each one, please click on the link.

Bahá’ís writing about near death experiences include:

Reinee Pasarow:

Barney Leith:  Explaining Near Death Experiences part 1:

Barney Leith:Explaining Near Death Experiences part 2:

Steven Kolins:  Near Death Experiences and the Baha’i Faith:

Michael Sudduth:  Near Death Experiences

SMK:

Near Death Experiences and the Bahá’í Faith:

Characteristics of NDE:

Bahá’í Forum on NDE: 

Books on NDE by Bahá’í Authors: 

The Glorious Journey to God: Selections from Sacred Scriptures on the Afterlife By Hushidar Motlagh:

Life After Death: A Study of the Afterlife in World Religions by Farnáz Ma’sumian:

Light after Death, by Alan Bryson (online version):

Light after Death, by Alan Bryson (print version):

Near-Death Experiences, the Rest of the Story: What They Teach Us about Living and Dying and Our True Purpose by P.M.H. Atwater:

Purpose of Physical Reality, by John S. Hatcher, has a chapter on the Bahá’í teachings in relation to NDEs – ”The Eternal Consequences of the Physical Experiences” p. 118 – 154:

 Videos:

Reinee Pasarow:

Reinee Pasarow 2:

Glimpse of Paradise:

Podcasts: 

Nina Lemke Harvey:

Nina Lemke Harvey 2:

Books by non-Bahá’í Authors

Heaven is for Real:  A Little Boy’s Astounding Story of His Trip to Heaven and Back

Coming Back To Life: The After-Effects of the Near-Death Experience by P.M.H. Atwater

 

What’s been your experience with near death experiences?  Feel free to post it here:

 

I was recently contacted by a couple who had a chance to go on a 3-day visit to the Bahá’í World Centre.  Neither had been on pilgrimage before, and considered this the next best thing.  The husband wanted to go, and the wife did not.  They were at a stalemate and wondered if I could [...]

I was recently contacted by a couple who had a chance to go on a 3-day visit to the Bahá’í World Centre.  Neither had been on pilgrimage before, and considered this the next best thing.  The husband wanted to go, and the wife did not.  They were at a stalemate and wondered if I could help.  What follows are some ideas that we explored together.

When you go on pilgrimage, or for a three-day visit, you’re going to the most sacred spot on earth to have the most sacred experience of your life.  Your goal is for your soul to connect with your Beloved.  It’s an intensely personal experience, so in some ways it might be better not go as a couple, so that you can totally, totally be focused on your own experience without having to worry about your spouse.  You may be giving him a real gift to let him go by himself.

Although family members are allowed to go on pilgrimage and many do go as a family, I’ve never seen anything in the Writings to suggest you should go with them.  I think if Baha’u'llah meant for couples to do it together He would’ve said so.  Instead He said it is required for men but not for women, so to my mind, pilgrimages are not meant to be taken together for the purpose of strengthening the marriage.

The Lord hath ordained that those of you who are able shall make pilgrimage to the sacred House, and from this He hath exempted women as a mercy on His part. He, of a truth, is the All-Bountiful, the Most Generous.  (Baha’u'llah, The Kitab-i-Aqdas, p. 29)

If you don’t go, there’s another way of looking at it:  instead of worrying that you are giving something up by letting him go alone, there’s a quote that says the greatest of all pilgrimages is to relieve the sorrow laden heart.  In that context your sacrifice itself is the greatest of all pilgrimages.

Remember the saying: ‘Of all pilgrimages the greatest is to relieve the sorrow-laden heart.  (Abdu’l-Bahá, Selections from the Writings of Abdu’l-Bahá, p. 92)

Whether or not to go with a family member is a decision that everyone has to make themselves.

What has been your experience?  Post your comments here:

 

 

 

 

Feeling judged by others is a fairly universal theme among my clients and friends, so I wanted to share some insights I’ve gained which might help you reframe the way you hear hurtful comments. The spiritual principles you need to understand are the relationship between our lower and higher natures, the principle of neither giving [...]

Feeling judged by others is a fairly universal theme among my clients and friends, so I wanted to share some insights I’ve gained which might help you reframe the way you hear hurtful comments.

The spiritual principles you need to understand are the relationship between our lower and higher natures, the principle of neither giving offence nor taking offence; and the concept of “love languages”.

Dual Natures:

We were born with both a higher and lower nature.  The lower nature is the voice of the ego, and the higher nature is the voice of God.  You can tell the difference between the two, because one is judging and condemning, and the other is pure love.

It’s common to hear “you should” . . . and immediately go to “I’m not good enough”.  Both sentences are lies emanating from our lower nature!  The only one who knows what you should do, is God, and you can know His will for you through the Bahá’í Writings.

The truth is that God created you perfect . . .

With the hands of power I made thee and with the fingers of strength I created thee; and within thee have I placed the essence of My light. Be thou content with it and seek naught else, for My work is perfect and My command is binding. Question it not, nor have a doubt thereof.  (Baha’u'llah, Hidden Words, Arabic 12)

. . . and noble,

Noble have I created thee, yet thou hast abased thyself.  (Bahá’u'lláh, Hidden Words, Arabic 22).

We abase ourselves every time we act from the lower nature, by putting ourselves down or allowing others to do so.   You’re good enough for God, and that’s all that matters.

Giving and taking offence:

To protect us from ourselves, the Bahá’í Writings tell us we’re not to give offence nor take offence:

Thus no member should ever allow himself to be prevented from expressing frankly his view because it may offend a fellow member; and, realizing this, no member should take offence at another member’s statements.  (Universal House of Justice,  Lights of Guidance, p. 179-180)

When we “give offence” we are deliberately saying things designed to oppress a soul – another “no-no” in our Faith:

There is no fire in the eyes of those who have known God and His signs, fiercer than to transgress His laws and to oppress another soul, even to the extent of a mustard seed.  (The Bab, Selections from the Writings of the Bab, p. 79)

“Taking offence” means believing someone else’s lie – something spoken from their lower nature.  The best remedy for that is to see them as captives of their lower nature, and forgive them:

If someone commits an error and wrong toward you, you must instantly forgive him.  (Abdu’l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 453)

Language of love

Dr. Gary Chapman has written a book called “The Five Languages of Love”.  In it, he identifies 5 ways in which people demonstrate their love for each other:

Words of Affirmation:  If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important—hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten.

Quality Time:  In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful.

Receiving Gifts: Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday, anniversary, or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures.

Acts of Service:  Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter.

Physical Touch:  A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.

For example, I’m a person who values quality time and acts of service, and don’t particularly care about getting gifts.  As a life coach, I’m likely to think deeply about what my clients tell me and sometimes go overboard finding the exact quotes from the Bahá’í Writings which might help them solve their problems.  Sometimes, clients who value words of affirmation “take offence” because I give them lengthy responses which turn into blog postings instead of simply affirming that they are OK where they are.  They feel judged instead of feeling loved, and “take offence” when no offence was intended.  They don’t understand that I was only acting out of my “love language”.

A note to my life coaching clients:  You can be 95% certain that whatever I say, I am not judging you (the other 5% is because I’m human!)  One thing you can know for sure, though, is that I can’t bear to give offense.  If I know I’ve hurt someone, it hurts me even worse!

Click here to find out what your love language is.  You don’t need to give your name and email address.  Just click on “skip this step”.

How has your life been affected by giving or taking offence?  Post your comments here:

 

 

As we learned in the previous blog posting, the Bahá’í Writings tell us the poor are “very dear to God”; “the mercies and bounties of God are with them”; they are “never forgotten” and they are “nearer the threshold of God”. The mercies and bounties of God are with them. The rich are mostly negligent, [...]

As we learned in the previous blog posting, the Bahá’í Writings tell us the poor are “very dear to God”; “the mercies and bounties of God are with them”; they are “never forgotten” and they are “nearer the threshold of God”.

The mercies and bounties of God are with them. The rich are mostly negligent, inattentive, steeped in worldliness, depending upon their means, whereas the poor are dependent upon God, and their reliance is upon Him, not upon themselves. Therefore, the poor are nearer the threshold of God and His throne.  (Abdu’l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 33)

This is particularly appealing to someone like me, who doesn’t feel loved by any of the significant people in her life (parents, siblings, spouses or children).  I want to know that someone I can trust loves me!  If that keeps me poor, then so be it!

I can see where people might be confused on this issue.  On the one hand, we read quotes such as these, which suggest that we need wealth, acquired through crafts or professions:

Having attained the stage of fulfilment and reached his maturity, man standeth in need of wealth, and such wealth as he acquireth through crafts or professions is commendable and praiseworthy in the estimation of men of wisdom.  (The Universal House of Justice, Messages 1963 to 1986, p. 437)

And that if you want wealth, the secret is to engage in crafts and professions:

Thus it is incumbent on every one to engage in crafts and professions, for therein lies the secret of wealth, O men of  understanding! For results depend upon means, and the grace of God shall be all-sufficient unto you.  (Adib Taherzadeh, The Revelation of Baha’u'llah v 2, p. 281)

And that we have an obligation to expend our wealth on ourselves and our families (in that order):

The best of men are they that earn a livelihood by their calling and spend upon themselves and upon their kindred for the love of God, the Lord of all worlds. (Baha’u'llah, Hidden Words, Persian 82)

On the other hand, you don’t want to have too much wealth, because the rich are described in negative terms:

The rich are mostly negligent, inattentive, steeped in worldliness, depending upon their means . . . (Abdu’l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 33)

God hasn’t promised mansions to those who associate with the rich:

God has not said that there are mansions prepared for us if we pass our time associating with the rich, but He has said there are many mansions prepared for the servants of the poor, for the poor are very dear to God. (Abdu’l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 33)

As long as there are poor people, those with colossal wealth should not exist:

A financier with colossal wealth should not exist whilst near him is a poor man in dire necessity.

Excessive of wealth is associated with tyranny:

A financier with colossal wealth should not exist whilst near him is a poor man in dire necessity. When we see poverty allowed to reach a condition of starvation it is a sure sign that somewhere we shall find tyranny. (Abdu’l-Bahá, Paris Talks, p. 153)

According to the Writings, their wealth has been found by “idle fancy” and they don’t know how to be self-sacrificing:

In idle fancy they have found the door that leadeth unto earthly riches, whereas in the manifestation of the Revealer of knowledge they find naught but the call to self-sacrifice. They therefore naturally hold fast unto the former, and flee from the latter.  (Baha’u'llah, The Kitab-i-Ian, p. 28)

Having wealth can prevent you from entering the Kingdom of Heaven:

. . . riches do prevent the rich from entering the Kingdom; and again, He saith, ‘It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter into the Kingdom of God.’ If, however, the wealth of this world, and worldly glory and repute, do not block his entry therein, that rich man will be favoured at the Holy Threshold and accepted by the Lord of the Kingdom.  (Abdu’l-Bahá, Selections from the Writings of Abdu’l-Bahá, p. 195)

If the wealthy are able to use their wealth in service to God, it is highly meritorious.  I’m not sure how many of us are able to attain this level of generosity, self-sacrifice and detachment, as we’ve seen in previous quotes, so it’s better for us to avoid it:

If wealth and prosperity become the means of service at God’s Threshold, it is highly meritorious; otherwise it would be better to avoid them.  (The Universal House of Justice, Messages 1963 to 1986, p. 437)

When you’re poor, you need to rely on God to supply your needs and be patient.  There’s a lot more obligation and responsibility on those who are wealthy:

Fear the sighs of the poor and of the upright in heart who, at every break of day, bewail their plight, and be unto them a benevolent sovereign. They, verily, are thy treasures on earth. It behoveth thee, therefore, to safeguard thy treasures from the assaults of them who wish to rob thee. Inquire into their affairs, and ascertain, every year, nay every month, their condition, and be not of them that are careless of their duty.  (Baha’u'llah, Gleanings from the Writings of Baha’u'llah, p. 236)

Men must bestir themselves in this matter, and no longer delay in altering conditions which bring the misery of grinding poverty to a very large number of the people. The rich must give of their abundance, they must soften their hearts and cultivate a compassionate intelligence, taking thought for those sad ones who are suffering from lack of the very necessities of life. (Abdu’l-Bahá, Paris Talks, p. 153)

He should be . . . bestowing a portion upon the destitute, and not refusing benevolence and favor to the unfortunate. (Compilations, Baha’i Scriptures, p. 50)

He admonished all that we must be the servants of the poor, helpers of the poor, remember the sorrows of the poor, associate with them; for thereby we may inherit the Kingdom of heaven. (Abdu’l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 33)

Good God! is it possible that, seeing one of his fellow-creatures starving, destitute of everything, a man can rest and live comfortably in his luxurious mansion? He who meets another in the greatest misery, can he enjoy his fortune? That is why, in the religion of God, it is prescribed and established that wealthy men each year give over a certain part of their fortune for the maintenance of the poor and unfortunate. That is the foundation of the religion of God, and the most essential of the commandments.  (Abdu’l-Bahá, Baha’i World Faith, p. 283-284)

Those who are wealthy should use their wealth as a means to draw close to God, instead of being so attached to their wealth that they forget God and His commandments:

If they are wealthy, they should make these bestowals a means of drawing nigh unto God’s Threshold, rather than being so attached to them that they forget the admonitions of the Pen of the Most High.   (The Universal House of Justice, Messages 1963 to 1986, p. 437)

If they don’t, wealth will lead to destruction:

Turn to the Book of the Covenant, the Hidden Words, and other Tablets, lest the cord of your salvation become a rope of woe which will lead to your own destruction.   (The Universal House of Justice, Messages 1963 to 1986, p. 437-438)

Once men acquire wealth, it’s easy to become so bewitched by their newly amassed wealth and status that they forget the true meaning of their lives; and they forget God.  Look what happens as a result:

How numerous are those negligent souls, particularly from among your own compatriots, who have been deprived of the blessings of faith and true understanding. Witness how, no sooner had they attained their newly amassed wealth and status, than they became so bewitched by them as to forget the virtues and true perfections of man’s station. They clung to their empty and fruitless lifestyle. They had naught else but their homes, their commercial success, and their ornamental trappings of which to be proud. Behold their ultimate fate. Many a triumphal arch was reduced to a ruin, many an imperial palace was converted into a barn. Many a day of deceit turned into a night of despair. Vast treasures changed hands and, at the end of their lives, they were left only with tears of loss and regret. (The Universal House of Justice, Messages 1963 to 1986, p. 438)

The wealthy have to protect their treasures and worry about someone stealing them:

Others ere long will lay hands on what ye possess, and enter into your habitations. Incline your ears to My words, and be not numbered among the foolish.  (Baha’u'llah, Gleanings from the Writings of Baha’u'llah, p. 260)

Would that the inhabitants of the world who have amassed riches for themselves and have strayed far from the True One might know who will eventually lay hand on their treasures; but, by the life of Bahá, no one knoweth this save God, exalted be His glory.  (Baha’u'llah, The Summons of the Lord of Hosts, p. 171)

I knew someone who didn’t have a lot, but he was still afraid of losing it.  He wanted to have a home alarm system installed on his house, even though he lived in a tiny village where everyone knew each other and the crime rate was almost zero.  I couldn’t imagine living with this level of fear, suspicion and mistrust.  ‘Abdu’l-Bahá tells a similar story:

‘Abdu’l-Bahá told a story about a Persian believer’s journeys and how he could not sleep at night while in the wilderness for fear of someone stealing his new shirt, a new gift from a prominent person. After several sleepless nights he decided to get rid of the shirt so he could relax.  (Rafati, Vahid, Sources of Persian Poetry in the Bahá’í Writings, Vol. lll, p. 80)

Wealth is fleeting and has no lasting effect:

How many kings have flourished in luxury and in a brief moment all has disappeared! Their glory and their honor are forgotten. Where are all these sovereigns now?  (Abdu’l-Bahá, Divine Philosophy, p. 137)

They attained to wealth, to the comforts of life, to fame. And what was the final outcome? Utter evanescence and oblivion. Reflect upon this. Look upon it with the eye of admonition. No trace of them remains, no fruit, no result, no benefit; they have gone utterly — complete effacement.  (Abdu’l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 186)

Look what happens to someone who wrote to Baha’u'llah begging for wealth and prosperity:

Haji Muhammad-Baqir was a well-known merchant, foremost among the believers in faith, certitude and enthusiasm, and was serving the Cause with devotion and self-sacrifice.  This man attained the presence of Bahá’u'lláh in Baghdad. There He wrote a letter to Him and begged for wealth and prosperity. In answer, this exalted and wonderful Tablet was revealed for him. In it Bahá’u'lláh stated that his request would be granted and that the doors of prosperity and wealth would be opened for him from every direction. He warned him, however, to be on his guard and not to allow riches to become a barrier and make him heedless.  Now you are here to attain the presence of Bahá’u'lláh and in the future you will witness that this man will be overtaken with fear to such an extent that he will renounce God and His Cause. Not long after, he will make substantial losses, following which he will write a letter to Bahá’u'lláh and repent. God will then turn his losses into profit and he will become again highly successful in his business and will emerge as the foremost merchant in Constantinople and Tabriz. However, this time he will wax prouder than before, more heedless and deprived… This time he will lose all his possessions, will be unable to continue trading and will become helpless in arranging his affairs. It is then that he will repent and return, and will be content to live as a poor man. He will spend the days of his life in the service of the Cause of God. His end will be blessed and he will receive great confirmations from God.’ He then said to me: ‘Remember all these things, for they will come to pass, and you shall witness them.’  (Adib Taherzadeh, Revelation of Bahá’u'lláh, v2, p. 277-278)

Knowing this in advance, do you think you’d change your mind?  I know I would!

This doesn’t mean I’m always able to be grateful for my poverty, or that I am always free from anxiety about how my bills are going to be paid, so I find this quote reassuring:

The lives of the Founders of our Faith clearly show that to be fundamentally assured does not mean that we live without anxieties.  (Shoghi Effendi, Quickeners of Mankind, p. 117)

Fortunately there’s another way of thinking about wealth.  In this dispensation it is described by the excellence of his conduct, in love of God and in detachment from luxuries.

Man’s distinction lieth in the excellence of his conduct and in the pursuit of that which beseemeth his station, not in childish play and pastimes. Know that thy true adornment consisteth in the love of God and in thy detachment from all save Him, and not in the luxuries thou dost possess. (Baha’u'llah, The Summons of the Lord of Hosts, p. 62)

Now that’s a kind of wealth I can be comfortable with!

 

For more on this theme:

Does God want us to be Wealthy

When is Enough, Enough